"Alcohol gives me confidence" ....and other lies

The Lies We Tell Ourselves About Drinking

One of the trickiest things about alcohol isn’t what it does to our bodies, or even what it takes from our lives. It’s the way it whispers to us. The way it convinces us we need it. The way we lie to ourselves, over and over, to justify the next glass.

If you’ve ever tried to cut back or quit drinking, you’ve probably bumped into these mental roadblocks. Some sound innocent. Some sound convincing. But they all share one thing: they’re not true.

Let’s break down a few of the most common lies we tell ourselves about drinking and what’s really going on underneath.

“I drink to relax.”

This one’s a classic. And it makes sense, alcohol does provide a temporary sense of calm. But what we rarely admit is the rebound effect. That ‘relaxation’ is followed by disrupted sleep, heightened anxiety, and emotional volatility.

Truth: You’re not relaxing, you’re numbing. And that stress? It’s still there and if you drank too much then in the morning, it's probably stronger.

“Alcohol makes me more fun.”

Many people drink to loosen up, to feel social, to be the life of the party.

Truth: Alcohol doesn’t make you fun, you make you fun. Alcohol might lower inhibitions, but it also lowers your control and clouds your judgment. You're already enough, just as you are.

“Alcohol gives me confidence.”

This one runs deep. Alcohol can feel like liquid courage - suddenly you’re bolder, louder, funnier, more flirtatious. It’s a fast pass through awkwardness and insecurity.

But here’s the catch: if you always drink to feel confident, you never really learn how to be confident. You never build that muscle. You never face the quiet work of learning how to feel secure in your skin, sober.

Truth: Alcohol doesn't give you confidence, it rents it to you, with interest. Real confidence takes time. It comes from showing up for yourself sober, again and again, until your presence alone feels powerful.

“I’m not that bad.”

We compare ourselves to stereotypes - the homeless alcoholic, the person drinking at 8 AM, the dramatic rock bottom. If we don’t look like that, we must be fine... right?

Truth: You don’t have to hit “rock bottom” for alcohol to be a problem. If it’s impacting your sleep, self-worth, relationships, or health then it’s enough.

“I’ve earned it.”

After a long day, a tough week, or a big achievement, alcohol becomes the reward. It’s the badge, the treat, the adult dessert. But does it really give you what you think you deserve?

Truth: You deserve rest, peace, clarity, and joy. A drink might offer a flash of that, but it steals more than it gives.

“Everyone drinks.”

It’s easy to believe this when your social life revolves around alcohol. Bars, dinners, weddings, networking events - booze is everywhere. But just because it’s normalised doesn’t mean it’s healthy or universal.

Truth: Not everyone drinks. And more people than you think are questioning their relationship with alcohol, quietly or openly.

“I’ll quit tomorrow.”

Tomorrow is the favourite day of every drinker who’s not ready to quit today. It feels like a commitment, but it’s actually avoidance dressed up in good intentions.

Truth: The decision to quit, or even to just pause only happens now. Tomorrow is just a loop.

Let’s Get Real

These lies aren’t signs of weakness. They’re signs of a culture that’s normalised something addictive and damaging. They’re defense mechanisms and they’re understandable.

But unlearning them is where the real work (and freedom) begins. Sobriety isn’t just about removing alcohol. It’s about removing the stories that kept you tied to it.

And once those stories start to unravel, something beautiful happens: you start telling yourself the truth again.