How am I supposed to socialise without alcohol?

I went to my first Christmas party of the year last night. A party for a local women's business group I'm part of.

I was a little nervous because I really only knew one person, and I don't even know her that well.

I know for a fact that I'm not as 'sociable' with people I don't know as I would have been when I was drinking.

After a few wines, I'd have chatted with anyone, manoeuvring around the room, I would have ended up dancing (something I don't like doing) and probably be the last one standing, wishing we could stay for another or go on somewhere else.

Last night I chatted to some people, some of whom I noticed were also not drinking alcohol. We talked about our businesses, podcasts, our dogs, weight loss jabs, the local town, and all sorts of things.

I'll admit, events like this, where I don't really know anyone particularly well, can still be a bit of a challenge for me because I'm an introvert. But I also know that alcohol isn't the solution to that.

The solution is just getting out there anyway. Social skills are like a muscle. The more you exercise them, the better you get. The saying "practice makes perfect" is true for so many things in life.

The event started at 8 pm and ended at 11 pm, but I left around 10 pm. And that was OK. I'd spent a good two hours getting to know some new people. People I will see again at later events. I'd had a little food and a couple of alcohol free drinks, and now I could jump in my car and drive home, safely knowing that in the morning I would feel relaxed and not hungover (that never gets boring!). And guess what? No one is wondering where I went or why I wasn't drinking. They are all too busy dealing with their possible hangovers!!

There will always be challenging times when you don't drink because, in some situations, we're used to alcohol being the main ingredient. And for many of us, that's been decades!

Remember, you can do whatever you want. You don't even have to go if you don't want to, but when you do, you build real skills, resilience and confidence. Not fake confidence and not lower inhibitions borrowed from alcohol.